Presumably cis female so she/her/her's pronouns work fine, definitely white, probably not straight but certainly disinterested. Trying to get better about things, but I slip up sometimes. Call me Mari; I'm looking forward to the day we can all get internet in our heads, and the inevitable dystopia that will ensue.
Reblogged from pheonixwings394  26,855 notes

joachimmurat:

I still find it the funniest thing that the French nobles were scandalized when Louis XVI *didn’t* take an official mistress or sleep around, as French kings were expected to in the 17th and 18th centuries.

He’s just like “but I love my wife” meanwhile the court at Versailles is all “what the fuck is this monogamy bullshit”.

Reblogged from hannahkunkle  36,641 notes

toxicwinner:

how many times have i seen the prettiest girls w the ugliest guys and I’m staring at him wondering if it’s the way the light is hitting his face or smth and she’s looking at me like stay away from my man…listen im just trying to solve a puzzle you beautiful idiot

Reblogged from dotthefembot  20,604 notes

brood-of-froods:

i like to think that hogwarts has a really strong wi-fi signal, but like the stair cases, it keeps moving around. just muggleborns, chillin on their laptops all suddenly stand up together, dash madly to a different corner of the school, and sit down wordlessly like some kind of mind hive flock of pigeons while the purebloods are just so confused

Reblogged from tariakabara  41,002 notes

ducktrainer:

saemiligr:

dear-monday:

So we know it’s JK’s headcanon that Dudley has a magical child, right? Imagine his kid starting to show signs of magic and Dudley remembering all the odd things that used to happen around Harry. Imagine his kid coming home from Hogwarts and being all, “WHY DIDN’T YOU TELL ME UNCLE HARRY WAS FAMOUS?” Imagine Dudley reading up on Harry and finding out about all the stuff he did and all the things that happened to him and struggling to grasp how his scrawny, speccy cousin saved the wizarding world. Imagine Dudley, white-faced with terror at his first big family get-together with Harry, Hermione and all the remaining Weasleys. Imagine Mrs Weasley being decidedly cool towards him until he eats fifth helpings of everything she cooks and telling her that she’s the best cook he’s ever met. Imagine Dudley meeting Fleur. Imagine the others embarrassing Harry by telling Dudley stories about him. Imagine Dudley and Harry going down the pub together for beers. Imagine Harry still calling him Big D. Imagine Dudley cheerfully never dieting ever again and being fat and happy forever THE END.

This makes me absurdly happy

did they just made me happy about DUDLEY